| Welcome to Love And Dating Tips |
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| Dating Tips for Men – Love and Dating Tips |
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| Dating Tips for Men: Preparing for a Date
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| When it comes to successful dating sometimes the biggest problem is where to start. Sadly the “art” of courtship flew out the window centuries ago. Social protocol is a dying art, and very few young men take etiquette classes.
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| If you’re lucky, your mother gave you some dating tips growing up. But if you’re like most boys, you didn’t pay attention.
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| Although most women didn’t take dating classes either, they’ve watched a lot of sappy movies, and they do have expectations. Managing those expectations is the first rule of successful dating.
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| Assuming you like the person you’ve asked to go on a date, the success begins before she even says she’ll go out with you. Before you ask, come up with a couple of ideas of where you’d like to take her. There are certain things that qualify as a “date” and certain things that don’t.
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| Meeting your buddies at a bar to play pool is not a date. Hooking up later that night is not a date. A date is just that – a point in the future when you will get together specifically for the purpose of spending time together. It’s something you put on your calendar. It’s something you look forward to and possibly stress about. It’s something you plan and prepare for.
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| When your date says “Yes” offer up a few options of things to do. You can certainly ask her if she has any specific ideas of her own, but you can take some control up front by having some ideas prepared. Women like a man who takes charge. So offer her a few options – dinner or a concert or some bowling – and then plan the rest of the date accordingly.
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| Now that you know what you’re doing and you’ve given yourself a few days to prepare, spend a little time getting ready. In dating, appearance and cleanliness count. Big time. That means both you and your car. Clean up your car, vacuum it, get rid of the trash, and wash it. Your car is the first thing a woman sees, and although make and model don’t necessarily count, cleanliness does. Pay for a professional to do the job if you have to. Just make sure your car is clean.
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| This may sound obvious, but take a shower before the date. Even if you had one in the morning or at the gym after work, take a date shower. Use a body wash or something that gives you a clean, mellow scent. Don’t go overboard on fragrance. Bad cologne can kill a date, and fragrance allergies are common. It’s best to skip the cologne, get a clean shave, and use a mouthwash.
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| Pay attention to the details. Hands are very important in dating. Get the goop out from under your nails, and if you’re not up for a professional manicure, at least trim and clean your nails and use a little lotion to make your hands soft to the touch.
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| When you pick your clothes for a date, etch it up a notch. Don’t wear the same thing you’d wear if you were staying home to watch football. Women like men who know how to dress. That doesn’t mean you have to wear a suit and tie, but a nice pair of slacks or a dress shirt, particularly in a color that compliments your eyes, can go a long way. Most women think shoes are important, so wear a nice pair. Shoes should match your belt. Don’t ask why, just do it.
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| If you need to get something new to wear and you need a little help, ask your mother or your sister or a female co-worker you can trust. You can always ask the sales clerk for her opinion, but that can be risky. One good rule: stay away from the sale rack. As tempting as 75 percent off might be, that plaid monstrosity didn’t sell in the first place for a reason. Just remember, you can’t look like a million bucks if you only spend $14.95.
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| On the day of your date, give your date a call early in the day to let her know you’re looking forward to the evening. If you really want to impress her, send a small bouquet of flowers or a simple plant. Even a text message may be appropriate. Keep in mind that you do like this girl, and a little romance might seem a little weird at first, but with most women it can go a long way.
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| When you pick up your date (at her door – no honking from the drive), be sure to smile and compliment her on how she looks. After all, she probably took twice as long as you did to get ready for this occasion.
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| Old fashioned manners, like opening car doors are important, and complimenting a woman on her hair or her clothes is a great way to start a conversation and see what she thinks about you.
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| Since she may also be nervous, don’t take it too hard if she doesn’t quickly return the compliment or say something about how your shirt matches your eyes.
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| A first date should be about sharing information and finding out more about each other. It’s natural to be nervous. Although you shouldn’t expect to hear someone’s deepest, darkest secrets, and you really shouldn’t share yours, the basic facts about yourself should be fair game for sharing.
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| If you’re not a stellar conversationalist, stick to the basics: ask her about her family or her hometown, her job or her apartment. Beginning a date with a nice drive to your location and small talk can help each of you relax and can start the date off on the right foot.
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| If you’re going to a restaurant or another public place, do your best to focus on your date. Even if the hostess or waitress is hot, resist the urge to flirt. Flirting with waitresses or visibly watching other women (particularly while your date is telling you something about herself) is a bad idea. Just don’t do it.
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| If conversation goes well, your date is probably going well. If it seems stifled or difficult, or if you’re finding it hard to stay focused or are quickly becoming bored, do your best to smile and stay focused.
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| If you’re lucky, your date will be interesting, it will flow freely, you’ll laugh easily with one another, and nature will take over from there.
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| If you’re unlucky (let’s face it, there’s a 50-50 chance), do your best to remember it’s just a date, and as dull as she might be she’s still a human being, so at least be nice. Resist the urge to fill a vacuum of silence with excessive drinking, and even if she turns out to be an obnoxious bore, be a gentleman.
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| First dates don’t have to last too long. Even if they are going well, it’s not a bad idea to end the date after about three hours. A leisurely dinner, followed by a short walk or drive, perhaps a cup of coffee or some ice cream, and then an early return to her door is a respectable first date.
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| If you had a good time, hold her hand and look her in the eyes and tell her so. Her response will dictate whether you should even think of going in for the good night kiss or even a peck on the cheek.
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| No matter how you feel or how good the chemistry is between you, long make-out sessions or spending the night on a first date is a really bad idea for reasons far too numerous to go into here.
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| Remember successful dating is a series of baby steps. Taking it slow is age-old advice that exists for a reason. If you concentrate on the little things as they come, keep your expectations in check, and don’t worry about the “end” result, dating can be fun.
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| Thank you to Connie Holubar for this “Dating Tips for Men” article.
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